Moving on over, yo.

My current blog can be found HERE.

I just re-read this whole blog and I don't dislike it very much and can't remember why I decided to delete it, so I'll open it back up again, but I'm only writing in my new blog, which is about art, training for a triathlon, and all the other things I do in my almost very nearly exciting life.

I love to write. And I have a bad memory, so these blogs are a catalog of my life that hold details which my mind never can contain. This is the extent of my purpose of writing blogs- I am not here to impress, to convince, to entertain, or to indulge you, the reader. Forgive me for being entirely selfish and writing only for the love of it, but I find no matter how hard I try this is the only way I can maintain a blog, and even, live any part of my life.

let's do this again

Well, after taking some time off, I think it's time to start this little blog back up. It's a good way for me to keep track of what I've done and a good outlet, since I do love to write.

Right now I am enrolled in an animation class, a Maya class, and a surgical illustration class. In addition to that, I am taking 2 credits of project research. I also started a graduate assistantship this semester with the Biomedical Informatics department at UIC. This week was a lot of work for the assistantship, preparing a research poster for presentation this weekend. I really enjoy my assistantship, as they tend to give me complex visual problems to solve... which is my favorite kind of problem!!

Right now I am finishing a scholarship application for my research, which has consumed the past 24 hours of my life. I hope to send it off today, and then I'm going home for a bit this weekend.

here's some introspection for you

somehow, after taking a long, long break from every-day running, i have moved to a place that has made running the highlight of my day. for, you see, i live right next to a gorgeous expanse of blue, blue, and some days, gray. the lake. framing the lakeside are tall, tall, buildings that scrape the blue, and toss reflections into the water. with such beauty, a desire has grown in me to know this lake again, as i did in college. you see, my college was right on the lake as well, and many times in a fit of rage i would storm out to the lake and stand on the bluff, 50 feet above the water below and let the wind whip my hair into my wet eyes and cry as the rush of the waves filled my ears. or, quietly, at night i would steal out into the frozen whiteness of snow and clear, clear skies of stars, and stand at the edge of the lake, pondering the gray stillness of the cold, clear lake. sometimes, i would walk out with a friend, and many long discussions full of revelations about our young selves would float over the lake, echoing off the bluff. in a fit of adventure i would scramble down the lake and seek treasure and walk along the muddy shore, amazed at the colors, scents, textures...

so, here, i am, again. at water's edge. this time, more often perched on a concrete edge, dangling my feet over into the deeper waters, inches below. a glance up, and i see the entire city, framed in blue. my entire life, is in that city. my entire future, resides in how i act in that city. my daily survival, is in that city. but here, apart, across the blue, away, i am only me. memories flood me, dreams carry me, and prayers float away over the water. here, i am not conscious one bit of the people that surround me, constantly, in this city, out here, in this world of blue, i am ever more conscious of my eternal soul, and i look far, far away.

and, so, i run. i run to this place, everyday. to escape, to confront, to remember, to plan. the lake, once again, carries away my tears, my fears, my dreams, away and away, and brings me on it's waves peace, hope, eternity, again and again.

as such, i know it in its every color, at every time of the day, in every weather. i am not a visitor here, i am a resident. in the midst of the forest of buildings, my mind wanders to the lake, and i reside again, there in the blue expanse, where i am only, me.

student loans are a long tunnel, my friend

a long tunnel with very little light. Today my dad told me about a new thing Obama has implemented that casts a little light on this situation: the Income-Based Repayment plan. Basically this plan states that you only have to repay your income, minus the poverty level income in the city you live in, and then 15% of that, a year.
Bonus: less money in payments a month, but
Bummer: takes longer to pay off, and interest still accrues.

To be honest I was kind of hoping Obama would forgive student loans over a certain level, but well, I guess he is only the President, not a magician. This website gives more information about how to calculate if you qualify and how much you are expected to pay back.

My parents didn't pay for any of my undergraduate education at a private college; lots of scholarships made it possible for me to attend, but I still graduated with a sizable loan. Then, I also decided I wanted to be a doctor, so for 3 years after I graduated I attended more school, while working full time. After that, I decided to go to grad school, and let's just say, education is not cheap.

Even so, I wouldn't change any of my decisions, even if I have dug a pretty deep hole for myself money-wise. It's comforting to know that even though I have a huge hole to fill, when all is said and done, I would do it all again in a heartbeat.

And yet it is a shame I forget so much of what I learn. hrmmm....

Hey I like this and so should you.

This is a really cool website that I found via this really cool blog. (I love hyperlinks)

Can you believe only a week ago I was...

sleeping little and spending waaaaaaaaay too much time on front of my computer. Ah well, it all ended and now I am recovered and ready to start the next adventure.

While shopping with a friend earlier in the week, I discovered my new best friend, Franco Sarto. Classy and elegant, I love his shoes. Shoes can be such a design accomplishment, that yes, I have bought shoes from a vintage used store and thought about setting them on a coffee table on display on account of their sleek lines and shape. I may still do this, since I wore them to a wedding and the soles wore off and they need to be re-soled before they can be worn again anyway.

I am not a shoe person, really, I just get excited over things designed well that look aesthetically pleasing. Like Swiss playgrounds.

Well I am off on my European adventure- not looking forward to the 10 hour flight there and back, but at the same time really looking forward to it. Need to do some deep thinking and re-assessing. I am grateful for this break and opportunity to think about things, and get a different perspective and remember what is really important.

Also, LOST? hello? Ben really was the good one all along. maybe? or maybe the most human. But certainly not pure evil as I thought. Too bad he made the wrong decision at the end, but he is the quintessential human. I would expect nothing less.

Hemostat

Guess what? ALSO made in 3ds Max. le sigh, Max, le sigh.